🤪J🤪KES

Here's your hilarious joke:

A drunken man was weeping outside of a bar, covered in vomit A stranger approached him and asked him what was wrong. The drunken, vomit covered man said "my wife said if I ever come home drunk again she would take the children and leave. They're everything to me!" The stranger said "Here's what you do. Take a $20 bill and put it in your pocket. When your wife asks what happened say you gave a friend that was too drunk to drive a ride home and he vomited on you. He felt so bad that he gave you enough money to buy a brand new shirt!" The drunk thought it might work so he headed home. As he walked through the door his wife immediately began berating him. The man said "honey listen. Pete called saying he was too drunk to drive. So I stopped on the way home and picked him up. But as we were driving Pete got sick and vomited on me. He felt so bad he gave me $20 to buy a new shirt." He then reached into his pocket and handed his wife the money. The wife said "but there's $40 here". The man said "Oh yeah, he shit in my pants too"