🤪J🤪KES

Here's your hilarious joke:

A collection of OC jokes! Well I hope they're funny, anyway. The past few months I've been writing down anything that seems vaguely amusing to me. I imagine that some of them might be already-existing jokes without knowing it, but I hope you enjoy! * I was offered a job studying fog but I turned it down. In hindsight, I think it was a mist opportunity. * What vegetable likes to wait around in lines? Queuecumbers * What's a pensioner's favourite genre of music? Hip-op * I decided to drink something from a scientist's test tube. It tasted vial. * Why did the artist visit the bank? To draw some money. * What's the best thing about walking through a friendly forest? All the pleasantrees * I was going to make a joke about alcoholism, but I decided against it because I thought it'd be a bit too whiskey. * how do you greet the world's cleanest woman? "Hi, Jean". * I got kicked out of the wig shop because I didn't want toupee. * I bought an album called "Sounds of the Railway", but I didn't like any of the tracks * I tried to get into the Guinness Book of Records by smashing up music albums. I broke a lot of records. * Why were there clouds at the theatre production? Because it had been over cast. * I used to have a job testing the durability of trainers. You might think that sounds easy, but it was sole-destroying work... * Did you hear about the fellow who went insane trying to clear his sinuses? He ended up in a menthol hospital * I used to be obsessed with going to the bank. I'm trying to stop but I have withdrawal symptoms... * Why did the eagle go to church? Because it's a bird of pray. * Where do fish go to earn a degree? Tunaversity. * Someone suggested I should grow my hair down the back of my head. I wasn't keen on the idea, but I told them I'd mullet over. * I watched a movie documentary about the history of tea exports, it was rated PG tips. * Who stands outside the toddler nightclub? Baby bouncers. * I have a very special type of dog - it was cross-bred with a vegetable. It's a border cauliflower * What happened to the last aftershave in the cupboard? It felt colognely * What do you inject into a suit to make it look bigger? Bowtux. Bonus jokes that I didn't think were very good but decided to include anyway!!!! * I had a dinner cooked by Dr. Who. It tasted dalektable (like... delectable) * What do you call a sour supervisor? A lime manager. * What food keeps you warm on a cold day? Fajitas... (like uh, fa-heaters...) * What's the funniest type of cereal? A muesli (like... amuse-li?) * The Bow and Arrow is an excellent weapon, with one drawback. * Gambling can be very dangerous, if roulette it take over your life. * What do you call a boring, unoriginal piece of fruit? A banalna. * What do you call a piece of fruit that doesn't really matter? Not applic-apple.