🤪J🤪KES

Here's your hilarious joke:

"John, hurry back home, your wife is dead!" John is an average Joe from a small village in England. He is working away in London to support his family. One day, he receives a letter at work. It reads: "John, hurry back home, your wife is dead!" John takes the first bus back to his village and finds his fellow villagers gathered and huddled in front of her family's house, crying and weeping. He says to them: "Where is she? Take me to her at once!" So the villagers take him to her. John kneels in front of his wife, weeping. Just then, she miraculously opens her eyes and looks at John. He is bewildered. She smiles and says: "Oh John, how I have missed you! I played this facade so that you could come home and I could see you". They hug and John gives her a good shag right there and then. When they walk out of the house, hand in hand, the villagers gasp in shock. John explains, "I gave her a good shag and now she's up", and the village is relieved. Months later, John receives another letter, this time reading: "John, hurry back home, your father is dead!" John again takes the first bus back to his village and again finds his fellow villagers gathered and huddled in front of his father's house, crying and weeping. He says once more: "Where is he? Take me to him at once!" After some time, one of the villagers comes forward and sighs solemnly: "Don't bother John. We've all been shagging him for days. He's still not up"