🤪J🤪KES

Here's your hilarious joke:

St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates... ...when he saw three individuals approaching. Peter thought,'What the hell,I'm bored. I'll make a game of it.' "Hello,weary travellers!",he greeted."I see you've come a long way. I am proud of you. "However,startling news has arisen:I,the great St. Peter,am bored. So,we're going to play a game! "Each of you must tell me the story of how they died. The person who tells the best one gets to live in heaven,and the other two can go to hell...LITERALLY!" There is uneasy silence as this sinks in. Then,the first of the three men steps forward. "Picture this,"he says. "You've been suspecting your wife of cheating on you for about two months. So, you decide to come home early,unbenounst to her. You arrive home to hear moaning. You yell out,'I'm home!' You hear swearing and a breif scuffle,and then silence. And your wife calls out in a shaky voice,'H-hi,Robert.' You walk into the bedroom to see her fully naked,sweaty and covered by only the bedsheet. There are clothes on the floor. "You bend down to pick up an unfamiliar pair of grey corduroys. 'Hmm. Never seen these pants before,Helen.'Then you turn to face her. "'I'm not an idiot,I know what's been going on when I'm at work.' You say. You then search the entire apartment(well,your rooms,obviously)and find no man. Then suddenly,you hear something on the balcony,a scuffling noise. You dash out and see a man,clinging to the ledge of your balcony. "In a fit of rage,you begin to jump on his hands. But whichever one you jump on,he holds on with the other. You fly back into the room,grab the nearest object you can see (which happens to be a refrigarator) and throw it at him with all your might. He falls 25 stories and dies. But so do you,because the weight of the refrigerator yanks you off the balcony." "Not bad,"was St.Peter's response. Then the next man stepped forward."Picture this,"he said."Youre on your apartment balcony,trimming your hedges. When suddenly,you lose your footing and fall off! You however are able to cling to the balcony below yours. You sigh with relief,and figuratively jump for joy when a man runs out onto the balcony. He must have heard you fall! "But to your horror,he appears to be mad! This insane individual begins to jump on your hands,with you barley managing to hold on. Then he runs inside,and returns with a GODDAMN REFRIGERATOR! He throws it at you,and you die." "Humorous." Was St. Peter's response. The last man stepped forward. "Picture this,"he said."You're crouching,naked,in a refrigerator..." EDIT:Sorry guys/girls/other genders. This is on my shitty kindle paperwhite,so there are probably a fuck ton of grammar mistakes.